Saturday, July 10, 2010



There are times when I feel down.  You know those "pity poor me" moments in life?  Exactly! Every one has that feeling at some point or another.  It seems that recently I've been more focused on how my health is effecting my life than I may have been in the past.  The summer has been hotter so it's hitting me a little harder than usual. So while I've been concentrating on maintaining my "spoon level" life has still been going on around me. At times, I've wanted it to slow down so I could catch up. At others I wanted to speed up so I could get past a rough spot. I am one of those people who sometimes need reminders to slow down and just enjoy the little things.  Smell the flowers, notice the cloud shaped like a dragon (seen by my daughter of course!), or taste the way chocolate ice cream melts so creamily in my mouth.

My daughter's birthday party was definitely a reminder that I need to stop being so insulated and open my eyes to the very real truth that I am blessed no matter what my health diagnosis for the day is. I have fantastically supportive parents and in-laws who are willing to drop everything to make "L's" birthday special. She felt that she was the only little girl big girl in the whole entire world to ever have had a birthday as spectacular as hers was. To them she just lights up their world. And there's just no way that she would ever doubt that. She could not ask for more loving grandparents who are willing to have tea parties, imagine they are in safari's looking for monsters in far off places, take her swimming when it feels like it's a hundred degrees out, or take her to the 3D showing of a movie because it will just make it more special for her. In them she could ask for little more. And if she could ever find that little piece that would make it impossibly better, they would find a way for her to have her heart's desire!

In my friends I have an amazing family.  They were there with me all week with offers to help clean my hopelessly dirty house for "L's" party. They were there offering last minute grocery store runs as well. We sat in a dark movie theater whispering and giggling through a movie like teenagers, while our husbands looked on and shook their heads.  Each has something to offer "L" that I would fall short of.  My friends never cease to keep conversations interesting.  And have kept me sane on sooo many occasions.  They have become aunts and uncles to my daughter in ways that I couldn't have expected. Today's birthday party made "L" feel incredibly special and wholly loved. I can't even begin to describe the look of pure joy on her face when everyone sang her Happy Birthday.  To my friends who read this blog whom were not able to be invited...I am deeply sorry that our house isn't bigger so we could have included you in our celebration! You were missed. Truly!

My daughter is totally and completely a true gift from God. She was the perfect little baby to add to our lives. She makes me see things in new and exciting ways. And she never stops amazing me with her beauty, compassion, and sense of humor! On our worst days together she can always find a way to deflate my frustration and crack me up. I could just go on and on about her so I will stop myself at that.

In my husband I have found another incredible gift from God. He knew exactly who to send into my life.  We have been through many things together. Health scares, family deaths, cancer, my pregnancy, and a couple of other things.  I think we have been thoroughly "tested" and come out closer because of it. He works hard for our family to support us.  I can't thank him enough for giving me the opportunity to stay at home and raise our daughter. "L" has a great father in him, and I have a great partner. He takes on more than his fair share of the load at times to help me stay strong.  Again, I could go on about this so I will stop myself.

Now that I have gone on so long about the things that are leaving me to feel blessed, I will end on a more light-hearted note. Here are a couple of pictures to share from this past week...

Here is a picture of the dragon cake that I made/. I was pretty happy with my achievement.  After all it was the first cake that I had ever make that wasn't a classic size and shape!

Here is a picture of it with it's wings. The previous royal icing wings shattered while I was trying to trim the shish kabob sticks they were attached to.

Some of my royal icing work.

My daughter on her big girl bike. She was "in heaven" riding it! And of course the ensemble is not complete with out the Dora the Explorer bike helmet!

This is "L" looking out the window for her first friends to arrive. Seconds before she had said, "I want to get my party on Mommy!" Notice the "viking helmet" party hat she is wearing! Classic birthday party wear for a "How to Train Your Dragon" event.


Anonymous said...

What a wonderful reflection on life....

My motto is I have Sjogren's it doesn't have me! I really try to live by that,but I like you have those moments of self pity.

At the low moments I think of all the wonderful people I have in my life. I was blessed by God with an amazing family and church family that is very supportive.They are beside me through each day, no matter what that day may bring. From the joys and blessings God's given me to the worst day ever with a death of my oldest son in a tragic car accident.

Sjogren's is just a bump in the road,and lifes events make me appreciate what is truly important. It is a true blessing that you are able to stop and appreciate those around you even with this horrible disease.

Well Wishes,

Blogger Mama said...

Thanks Jackie! :o)

Tara said...

Really like this blog K, beautifully written!

Blogger Mama said...

Thanks so much Tara! :o)